Just a casual look around, nothing serious yet
Checking all the normal spots, no cause for upset
Under beds and wardrobes, back behind the coats
Won't take long, I'm just curious, just having a look, just... notes?
There's something here
I can feel it
I don't know what it is
But I'll know when I see it
God or gremlin? Who's seeking today?
Methodical and patient or completely led astray?
Is it where you thought it was or somewhere in between?
God or gremlin? Keep on looking—
It's definitely here
...probably
Airing cupboard, top shelf, behind the good towels
Sofa cushions, kitchen drawer, investigate the bowels
Of every box and bag and case that lives beneath the stair
Something wrapped and promising — an oven glove is there
There's a note
...the note is not helpful
There are more decoys
Oh no
There's something here
I can still feel it
I don't know what it is
But I WILL find it
God or gremlin? Who's seeking today?
Did you find a decoy? Did it lead you far astray?
Were you briefly very excited then immediately not?
God or gremlin? Keep on looking—
You're getting warmer
(...you're really not.)
Behind the fridge
Oh
That's where that went
Not a present
Just... a thing
Of unclear intent
The shed
The attic
The car
The boot
At some point this stopped being
A fun pursuit
Why would they be at your sister's
Why would you even think that
...why WOULD they be at your sister's?
God or gremlin? The seeker has lost
The gifts were somewhere else entirely at considerable cost
To your dignity, your afternoon, your faith in human nature
God or gremlin? Check the postcode—
You've been managed
See you later
It was never here
It was never here
You knew that on some level
It was never here
The hider sips their tea
Somewhere across town
You found an oven glove
And a note
And your dignity went down