Bottom of the wardrobe, back behind the coats
Under beds and high shelves, tucked away with notes
Labelled up in order, everything in place
God of gift concealment with a serene face
Or maybe not so simple
Maybe not so plain
Maybe there are layers
To this little game
God or gremlin? Where did you put it?
Is it findable or is it not — and did you mean it?
Normal place or something more creative?
God or gremlin? Either way—
They'll never find it there
Did you swap it with your sister, keep it at hers til Christmas day?
Did you rent a storage unit just to keep the snoopers away?
Are the decoys in position, everything arranged?
The gifts were never in this house
The hiding places are deranged
There may or may not be decoys
We're not saying where
There may or may not be measures
Just... be aware
God or gremlin? Where did you put it?
Is it findable or is it not — and did you mean it?
Normal place or something more creative?
God or gremlin? Either way—
They'll never find it there
They're searching room by room now
Checking all the usual spots
Finding nothing useful
Connecting zero dots
The gifts are safe and sorted
Miles away or maybe near
The hider sips their tea and smiles
It's the most wonderful time of year
God or gremlin? Where did you put it?
Organised and labelled or delightfully chaotic?
Either way the gifts are hidden
Either way the plan is working
God or gremlin? Either way—
They'll never find it there
They'll never find it there
They'll never find it there
The hider knows
And that's enough
They'll never find it there