Turkey's in the fridge now, basting overnight
Presents wrapped and sorted, everything's alright
Kids are finally sleeping, house is still and calm
Tree lights softly glowing, drink in hand, no alarm
Just a quiet moment
Just a little peace
Just the gentle feeling
Of a Christmas Eve release
God or gremlin? Christmas Eve is here
Everything is sorted, pour yourself some cheer
Silent night is happening, you've earned this little while—
God or gremlin? Either way—
You did it, have a smile
...BATTERIES.
Did I buy the batteries?
PRICE STICKERS.
Did I take the price stickers off?
This gift has no label
Whose gift is this
What even IS this
Who did I buy this for
It's fine
It's absolutely fine
We'll find the markers
We'll get creative with the box
God or gremlin? Christmas Eve at midnight
Everything was sorted and then suddenly it wasn't quite
Price stickers and batteries and a mystery present or three—
God or gremlin? Find a bigger box—
That solves it, you'll see
No label? Bigger box
Wrong shape? Bigger box
Batteries missing? Put the remote in
Mystery gift? Box
Price sticker won't shift?
BOX
The box doesn't judge
The box just holds it
The box is the hero
Of Christmas Eve
God or gremlin? Back on the sofa now
Drink in hand, tree lights on, you worked it out somehow
The shops will open soon enough if it all goes wrong
God or gremlin? Everything will be grand—
You've known it all along
Find a bigger box
Everything will be grand
Find a bigger box
It's all in hand
The turkey's in the fridge
The kids are asleep
Find a bigger box
And back to the peace